I can’t believe how much I’ve missed her and how vastly I’ve changed to try and make this work.
She’s beautiful to me.
And with every story and smile she bears towards me, the more of the oblivion I believe she’s gazed upon
to every smile
to every hand
to every kiss
…is significantly better than the last.
I miss her every time she leaves.
I spent most of my weekend with her.
Shooting / Cooking / Editing / Walking / Admiring / Cuddling…Kissing.
I told her today that I didn’t want anyone but her. No more games like before, no side girls whatsoever. She agreed.
She sees the better in me, not the worst like everyone else, including me. And today…I think she finally heard me.
I’m turning into a new me and I want her there.
My previous link was for my son’s mom. I’m not begging for her back anymore but she’s happy now. She’s the one that got away but that was pretty much done by myself and my own selfish actions. I need to change who I am in order for me to be happy in the future.
My Ex, there’s no way in hell that had anything to do with her. I loved her, but when she became selfish, and then decide to be emotionally and then physically abusive to me to prove a point is completely… horrendous.
It’s time I say something.
I should have ended it after the first time she laid her damn hands on me. What’s worse is when she couldnt even GRASP the concept of what she was doing and decided going off on a violent rage against myself and MY STUFF is okay (I have to look at my bent in stool every.single.day). And thats just about 30% of the awful things she actually did to me. She became much MUCH worse.
For people to go around and say that men dont get abused by their gf. ..is fucking ridiculous. Especially in this fucking state. Who can you HONESTLY tell anymore? And as soon as you try to finally get out of the relationship, they detach themselves and YOU get in trouble because you’re male (black male…and she’s white? You’re Fucked. Even in this day and age)
One of my coworkers was talking to me about the ou football player who was suspended for domestic assault. This dude went into a club and his gf at the time just starts WHALING on him. She keeps slapping him and going off…and then it gets to the point where he’s trying to leave the club and she just keeps hitting him. He turns around, then one punch, she’s down. Mind you all of this is recorded on video with a TON of witnesses who were at the club.
….everyone backs the girl.
The girl was drunk, guy was sober and wanted nothing to do with any of it.
Thr girl also had to go all the way to Texas to report it because she’s wanted in the state of Oklahoma. So can someone PLEASE explain to me how the hell that’s okay?
I know it might be rare. ..but any violence in a relationship…thats it. By ANY party. No one deserves that. End it right then and there. Period.
I am not, never have been, nor will i ever be a violent person. Especially after having to physically stop my brother from doing so and dealing with all his crap growing up. If you know me, then this is by no means a surprise.
This…hits home way too hard.
This is why I decided to change who I was.